So I’m sitting on our back porch

trying to answer those complicated questions of existence.

You know,

the “I think therefore I am”

sort of bull shit

and I hear Nancy

who’s sitting in the living room on her recliner

while she cheats on her cross-word puzzle,

asking Alexia,

“How do you spell Presperionia’s Mother’s name?”

and Alexia responds,

“I’m sorry, Nancy, I don’t know that!”

So,

I stop worrying that bone.

“Damn!”, I think to myself,

“I don’t have the teeth for this stuff anymore!

And besides,

if Alexia can’t spell Pepperoni’s Mothers Name,

well,

the Hell with it!

Why should I worry about whether

I exist, anyway???

I have an art-magnet on the refrigerator

with a sketch of Conffucious

looking all sour and confused,

saying, “I NEVER SAID ALL THAT SHIT!!”

Well, that’s good enough for me!

So I just doze on the porch

which is what porches exist for

on a beautiful Autumn day like this,

when a big, wamping-splash from the pond

wakes me like a scream!

Was it Archie, our resident gator

snatching another water moccasin?

Was it the big bass

grabbing some unsuspecting dragon fly?

Was it that big damn show-off snapper

doing a forward three and a half

off the rock at the water’s edge?

Well,

I’ll never know.

And that will henceforth be

my personal philosophy:

“I’ll never know and so what?”

And I think

THAT

will be enough for me….

(maybe.)