Depending,

I’m either

lucky,

fortunate

or blessed,

based on whether prayer counts.

Does “Thy will be done” eliminate

all explanations other than,

“Have a blessed day!”?

And what if WILL

decides I die slowly,

my body canabulizing itself

in our friendly neighborhood

cancer ward

or am consumed in a split second

fiery car crash into some

errant weaving gas truck,

exploding in one hot burning roar,

melting I-80 asphalt

and it wasn’t even my fault!

And what about luck?

That son-of-a-bitch

whose mouth has never uttered

so much as an, “Oh! My God!”

buys ONE

mega-lotto-quick-pick-tix

on a lark

at the corner 7-11

and wins a 400,000,000 $

windfall from Heaven,

disappointing 10,000,000 prayerful

Evangelicals and Episcopalians

and 2, 700,000 rosary fondling Catholics

while he skips away whistling

“Amazing Grace”!

Bless his heart.

Or maybe it’s the opposite.

Maybe I’m just

shit out of luck

or

“It’s a good thing there’s bad luck

or I wouldn’t have

any luck at all!”

or

I’ve been cursed since the day

my Momma bore me.

or

“Fortune favors fools,

little grasshopper”….

I simply don’t know.

So,

when I pray my lords prayer

in the shower tomorrow morning

I’ll say,

“Never-the-less, not my will but Yours….”

and see what happens

after that first shovel full of dirt

bounces off my coffin

and settles down into the mud below,

covering me with the last warm blanket

I’ll ever need.

Or,

maybe,

not…..